Today I was a tourist in my own hometown.

I had an hour to spend between things and I wasn't really sure what I sure do for that time. I was driving over to the library to maybe find a book when I passed by my dance studio. And I just had to pull over. I don't know why, but seeing the sign for my dance studio just made me stop and want do something different than my comfort of the public library.

So with my hour to spare, I decided how often do I walk around downtown and just "experience" what it has to offer? To be honest, I felt pretty silly. Here I was, walking down the not-so-busy main street with my camera out, taking pictures of things I see almost every day, and yet have never really stopped to observe. Some people drove by and looked over at me. Hey, it's a small town of 18,000. I probably knew some people driving by. I felt kind of funny.. but at the same time, who cared? I even went to a couple places that I'd never been to before. And I probably never would have, if I didn't have the challenge of doing something outside of my comfort zone.

It was fun. Just poking around- laughing to myself when I found some old Disney CD's at a bargain store, knowing that I would've bought them if I'd had some money with me-enjoying the sunny day-taking time to notice everyday places.

When was the last time you stopped to enjoy the normal things in life? Do it today. You might even have fun :)

Honesty, Insecurities and Lightning

If there's one thing I want to do throughout this blog, is be honest. And that's something I really struggle with. I have no problem being honest-on the surface level. I don't know how to really share with others what I'm thinking, feeling, going through. So I guess all I'm saying is that this blog will be a challenge for myself, to be more honest. with myself. with friends. with God. honesty


Our youth group worship team has the opportunity to play at our bible camp in the black hills. I've been looking forward to this ever since I found out, which was just a week ago. I'm playing guitar, my youth pastor is leading on her keyboard, her husband playing drums, my friend is singing and her brother is playing bass. I normally sing too, but was just asked to play guitar so I can focus on that. Sometimes I struggle singing and playing at the same time ;) Some students from another church are also playing with us so we have an electric guitar, guy singer and 2 other girl singers.


Tonight we had practice for that. I was really excited. I love being involved in worship. Our youth worship team drove to the other church so we could practice together. The set up of where everyone stands is different than what it is at our church, so I was off on one side of the stage. I kind of felt by myself. I guess I haven't felt that way in a while. Everyone seemed to be laughing, having fun. And for some reason, I felt I didn't fit in. I don't like that feeling. I suppose no one really does... I feel I've had enough past experience in this. I also felt insecure in my guitar playing abilities. Everyone else seemed to be rockin their instruments/voices, and I felt just average. I know I'm not fabulous at guitar, but I didn't even feel very talented. Like should I even be on the worship team? Shouldn't it be for more gifted people? Why am I not more talented? I'm glad I'm not singing, too, because I would feel like an even worse singer after hearing the other people sing tonight. insecurities

Tonight there was lightning as I was driving home. So beautiful! I remember one time when I was younger and was coming home when a lightning show was everywhere. I remember being enthralled in the bright and poweful lightning. I still feel that way. Lightning is beautiful to watch and also surprising, because you don't know where it will stike next, how big it will be, or how far away. I even pulled over to watch the storm for about 10 minutes. lightning

How all three of these topics relate, I don't know. Maybe they do, maybe they don't. I'll let you decide.

"Choice is the only thing we're given."


That is a line from the following song. It has stuck out to me every time I have listened to this song lately.

I really do believe that the only thing we are given in life is our ability to make our own decisions, our choices. No matter what we are given in life or lack of it, we will always have the ability to make our own choices. Even our own dreams and goals are made from choices we have made. And those are things that no one can take away from us.

They can also be affecting in positive and negative ways. One choice to reach out to a stuggling friend can be very positive. Choosing to look the other way when someone obviously needs help would not. Our choices affect our future. There are some things in life that we cannot control. But we always have to option to choose how we deal with the situations we are given. Our choices we make today help decide our tomorrow, our future years.


What choices are you making?

-positive or negative? lasting or forgotten?

Broken from the Start by Jon Foreman
Life is a gift like fresh cut roses
Cut from the branch and brought inside
It’s a slow contradiction that’s beauty in a vase
When the cords are cut that’s when we start to die

Lately death and life get so confusing
I can’t tell the difference here tonight
Lately every breath feels like I’m kissing death
And when time is dead I cease to be alive

If you hide yourself deep inside, deep inside
In time you’ve got nothing left to hide
There’s nothing left inside
Tonight, honey I am gonna break your heart
Mine was broken from the start, broken from the start

Choice is the only thing we’re given
For one will live, another dies
One road says hello the other says goodbye
And the roads that you don’t choose begin to die

They won’t pay a cent to hear you laughing
They might pay a little to hear you cry
If you do it long enough they might even pay attention
But they still won’t pay respect until you die

Today I'm thankful for...

*lip balm
*the sunshine
*purple nail polish
*strawberry smoothies
*personal e-mails