Breaking the Jar

So this is how I bottle it up inside.

Inside my head screams. My heart tenses. My face scrunches.

But nothing happens.

I don’t know how to let it out, how to release my anger and frustration.

So I bottle it up, keep it tight inside my jar until the jar gets too full.

And then it all comes out, in fast rushing water, poured out unwillingly

How do I not let the jar get too full?

I don’t know how to deal with my own behavior.

How do I change it?

I don’t want to be this way.

I think I’ve always been this way but have only just recently noticed it.

God, I don’t like this feeling.

I’m scared of how this jar is going to explode.

I should apologize in advance to whoever receives this anger.

It seems like I don’t let it sink in until everything I’ve gotten upset about combines into one burst of rage.

I don’t know how to change.

I just know I don’t want to keep on going living this way.